Today was one of those days, you know, the ones where everything seems to be going well until you hear someone say: ‘Onyx, why don’t you sit with me and explain this to me‘ at exactly 1655hrs and all your brain is capable of computing is how to escape to the nearest empty pod. I basically fucked up.
I should not be surprised really. This is an old habit of mine, actually let’s call it for what it is, an error in my programming. Flip the coin, and you get someone who can compute at fast speeds, which executives adore (obviously), but this leads to infrequent errors (which they are not very thrilled about). Now all I can do is stare at this screen while watching clips of domesticated animals and hope that tomorrow I can find a solution to it.
Actually tomorrow was going to be a big day for me – after much deliberation I’ve decided to do one of those bod-mod that the insurgents are wearing at the moment (must be a sign that an age crisis is soon approaching) but after today, I’ve decided to wait until my switch off period which is a mere 72hrs away. If anything, this means I could hide in my hab for a while while I recover. I hope my body does not reject it – I want this year to start somehow on a positive light.
Oh, I almost forgot to talk about the weekend! I decided on Friday that I had enough of the Belt so I went to the Citadel for a night of debauchery and confiscated substances. The entire crew was there, representing our subculture with leather, spikes and black make up. The music was blasting off the sound systems and the energy was so vigorous and powerful, you could almost taste it. I remember at one point during the night I had my eyes closed, moving my hips to the vibrations emerging from the terminal and for a split moment I was completely lost in the moment – my brain became this fluid colourful element with no singular thoughts or worry. I was present in that one single moment, not worrying about the credits, social classes or the future. It was bliss.
It made me realise I need more moments like that in my life.
Well, I better terminate this session and try to get some cool-down time before tomorrow arrives. Wish me luck.
Cyber Noir 2020 