Looking through old notes and files on the data slate, I found something I wrote a year ago, during a time of change. Scribbled in haste, stylus on screen, it still resonates. I’m surprised at the emotions it triggers in me, and proud that in some ways I was able to identify a solid line of thinking even in a time of turmoil. I had quit my failing career, and was now on the brink of something new. I didn’t know what, yet, but something.
I recall that I wrote it in a sterile office, modern and stark. I wore a grey suit and sought the creativity and soul that I knew was buried inside of myself. It was written in the final days before my resignation period ran out, as I communed with my future, in my mind.
In some ways, where I am now isn’t that different from where I was before. I’m still in Operations, I’m still working in central Citadel. I’m still in an office block. But in others, it is significantly different. I no longer wear the suit, I’m not in the corporate fast lane, and while the credits have dwindled, the consumption and wastage has, too. I have established a new lease on life, and a new way of thinking. I gave myself less pressure, at I time when I needed less pressure. Time to heal.
Things haven’t gone quite to plan. But that doesn’t mean they are going wrong. I think the message that I wrote to myself is something I can share, here. It is about adventure. And people.
They say it is lonely out here.
And they are right, it can be.
Out here in the black,
You see how empty it is.
How small we are.
The vast space between everything.
And everyone.
Eventually, you seek out company.
The small cluster of lights.
Thrown into the void by humanity.
The light of civilisation.
The light of people.
We journey. We explore.
We seek. We learn.
We soar.
But we also crash.
Things don’t always go our way.
Sometimes the weather turns.
Unbidden.
And we are forced back down.
We are not invulnerable,
No matter how well we prepare.
We will take hits.
And some will hurt.
Hurt bad.
The storms can be unrelenting.
It can feel hopeless.
…
But it is not.
You don’t need to wait,
For the storm to recede,
And the winds to drop.
Stand back up.
Take one step at a time.
Seek help. Refuge. Escape.
Survive.
It will feel hard.
But people will help.
They may no know you need it.
But.
They will shelter you, if you ask.
Don’t be afraid to ask.
Keep asking.
Most people are good.
Learn to rebuild.
Failing does not make you a failure.
It lets you learn.
Start again.
Rebuild.
Refuel.
Relaunch.
Don’t stop looking up.
Keep dreaming.
Keep trying.
Soar again.
There is more to experience,
Than we will ever be able to.
So don’t be afraid,
To seek your own experiences.
Your own choices.
Your own successes, failures, and lessons.
Your journey is your own.
But it can involve others.
Just don’t wait for them,
Go find it yourself.
And you will find others on the way.
Your experiences are your own.
But they can also be shared.
Who knows what is out there?
I don’t.
But I am going to find out.
Cyber Noir 2020 